SHOULD WE TEACH CHILDREN ABOUT BOUNDARIES?

My little niece ran into my room this morning while I was on call with a friend then the holy spirit laid it in my heart to talk to her about boundaries. There and then I told her Semilore, you must always knock on the door before coming into my room.

So as parent when is the appropriate time to start teaching our children /wards boundaries?

Honestly if you ask me it should be from day go, the bible was very clear about this, ‘Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.’ Niv (Prov22:6)

Our family wiz family a blogger observed that While it is healthy to have personal boundaries, not all personal boundaries, by definition, are healthy. In certain situations, our personal boundaries may be too rigid, preventing adaptation or personal growth. In others, they may be too open, causing us to take on more than we can handle or to be swayed too easily.

Boundaries are essentially about understanding and respecting our own needs, and being respectful and understanding of the needs of others,” explains Stephanie Dowd, PsyD, a clinicalpsychologist, “and for that to work, we need to be putting a big emphasis on helping kids develop greater empathy and self-awareness.

To teach children about what makes a health boundary parents should know how to identify the traits of unhealthy boundaries and endeavor to discipline themselves to adhere to the principles they want their children to inculcate, since children learn more through observation of the adult patterns that the adult instruction.

Your sincerely till next read
Keep raising a healthy generation while changing the narratives.
Témitope Popoola
Temiteeontop of God
temiteeontop@gmail.com

though....

THOUGHT

Thoughts are like little drops of water if not taken care of soon or immediately it becomes a mighty ocean that can sweep you off balance, and trust you, one may never be the same again if not for serious work and internationality.

Bad thoughts come subtly with no objective of being disruptive, but the moment you give it a little dwelling, it becomes real and you envisioned it, reason it, and care not taken, execute it.

Also, Good thought which brings happiness or takes you to a happy place drop too, and your dwelling on them brings illumination to your life.

"Deut.30.19 - I call heaven and earth as witnesses today against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing; therefore choose life, that both you and your descendants may live;"

Please meditate more on the word of God and the good thought that comes and I bet you the bad thoughts will have no place. This brings you to a place of self-love and control of emotions.

"Phil.4.8 - Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy--meditate on these things."

Olayemi Dorcas Enlighten.

Marriage counselor/Therapist.

Clarity Counselor.

DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOUR CHILDREN DO BEHIND YOU

USIFO VS CHIDINMA

DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOUR CHILDREN DO BEHIND YOU?

JUST BE GRATEFUL AND THANKFUL TO GOD…

I have carefully followed the commentaries' post-the-dreadful alleged murder of Usifo by a 21- year old female student of that fine school, Unilag. Many of those comments accused the girl and some of her victim. 

But what looks like some clarity is coming from the cloudy situation. It’s beginning to look like the young lady might not have worked alone and was a bit practiced in the act. The police hopefully will unravel the details. 

Now to part of my point. Let no one older than this girl act as if she did anything new. She didn’t. A lot of terrible things have always happened. Sadly. Let me share a few using my life. 

I attended a school set up by Americans and Canadians and the Western Regional government. Trust me we were very free, spoiled, indulged, a very liberal environment. Clothes laundered for us. Cafeteria systems like Unis. Socials and dancing till the wee hours. Sometimes Greyhound buses were brought in to take us to Ibadan and Lagos during holidays. Ask anyone who ever attended the Comprehensive High School Ayetoro. We were brought up as if the school was in the US or Canada. 

Why am I starting from here? The liberal environment helped produce brilliant students. Many have excelled nationally and globally. But it had a flip side. Liberty was abused by many students. By my form 4 I was smoking. Skipping classes, against regulations, going to town at night to eat. Hanging out in our “gangway” with girls, and I assure you we were not discussing academic issues. I first tasted marijuana during that period. We even left school for Lagos to be at Fela’s shrine. I was between 14 and 15. Prostitutes. Yes. 

From here I moved to the Polytechnic Ibadan for A levels and “improved” liberty and of course abuse. Openly drinking and smoking and being treated like adults. Let me save you the details. Of course, more drugs and a few ambitious friends used the Bible page as Rizla for smoking marijuana because it was light. Believe. 

Then on to Unilag. And I stepped up in liberty and freedom. Again more drinks. More drugs. More female relationships. Skipping lectures and tutorials. But passing. And gambling. My room in part 3 was one of the two “authorized” gambling joints in Unilag. R008. New Hall. Gambling from 4pm to 7am the next day almost daily. 

NYSC. Awesome. No control at all. More recklessness. Just imagine it. We did all and more. Then I started work 1982 and sobered a bit. But Shrine, smoking, etc continued. Small drugs too. Then all ended in 1987. I met Christ. 

Now, where am I going? Between Compro and NYSC I could have missed it. Some of my friends and mates did. Became addicts. Failed exams. No progress. Etc. Forgotten. 

But God was merciful. Our parents and guardians were good. Just as Chidinma’s parents have been. But my parents had no idea what I was doing in those days. I was gentle at home. Possibly what Chidinma is also. Quiet and well-behaved. At home. Like me. Possibly like you. But see what has happened. 

Folks let’s always thank God for His Grace. I see a lot of people condemning the girl etc. And you are right. BUT HOW MANY OF YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT YOUR CHILDREN ARE DOING WHEN YOU ARE NOT THERE OR WHILE YOU ARE NOT LOOKING THAT WAY? Do you know and trust your children well enough? 

Chidinma’s case is sad. It’s the failure of society and the system. Usifo an older man doing wrong things with a girl young enough to be her daughter. Many do this. Many are condemning her. No one knows how and when she derailed. It’s a sad case and I pray God will have mercy on her. 

It’s not the time to point fingers and recklessly condemn. It’s time for sober introspection about our society. Our youths. Our families. Our nation.  we need to ask valid questions about what is going on under our very own noses that we can't smell and what can we do to right this parenting error and this vice that sat among us like a son of the soil. It's Chidinma today and of course, Usifo is gone, it looks ok because its the adult that died, what about the many young girls who died in such situations and were swept under the carpets, or the man who died and such killings never get to the pages of our dailies? we need to up our games to rescue the future

May the Lord help us. May the Lord have mercy on us all. Amen. 

original story

LA

Orignally Written by Lolu Akinwunmi

Group executive chairman prima-garnet

 updated by Temitope Popoola

Morality VS Reality... How Nigerian Political Elected Governor Dish out Honors.

Morality VS Reality...

What informs our sense of  choice, what do we dubbed reality and what is really moral,

So again why do we vote for the people we vote for?

All this guestions bothered down to the vivid issues we face on daily basis and who  when left at the realm of afair . Sincerely the mathematics is adding up,

A Beyelsa Man wrote...

The young lady with white is a first class graduate of the Niger Delta university faculty of law as well as a first class graduate Nigeria law school, she was not honored by her state

The half naked girl with black is a third class graduate of Big Brother Nigeria, she was given a state reception and was also honored with an appointment and also declared role model to the Bayelsa state girl child (the face of the Bayelsa girl child) 

Before I forget, Let me state it clear here that she can't be the face of my girl child

Congratulations to our lawyer, the true face of the Bayelsa girl child.

 

Published as seen on the wall of 

Maxi Bosco Anaracha

On facebook

Disinformation, Misinformation and Social Media RegulationWe suggest PROACTIVE rather than REACTIVE measures are adopted - The Nigerian Global Affairs Council (NIGAC)

Disinformation, Misinformation and Social Media Regulation

We suggest PROACTIVE rather than REACTIVE measures are adopted - The Nigerian Global Affairs Council (NIGAC)

_____________________________

The Nigerian Ruling Class have a natural tendency to punish or create punitive measures to counter what they term 'BAD BEHAVIOUR' - Often times, when you seek to look deeper, you mostly see that these proposals for punitive measures are mostly introduced when their desire or freedom to not be held accountable is threatened.

In Nigeria, the problem of Misinformation is larger than the issue of Disinformation - Misinformation often emanates from willful or unwilful ignorance or simply put - PURE LAZINESS on the path of those who consume information to verify an Information they have consumed before sharing publicly, in some cases, you might even verify but see that the misinformation is so widespread that it becomes difficult to know what is legit or valid information. 

Often times, Misinformation Campaigns are targeted at Individuals who naturally don't process information they consume, the results isn't usually disastrous other than having an ignorant population.

Whereas, Disinformation is intentionally propagated to cause chaos, harm and unrest - disinformation campaigns are more targeted and better organized. Disinformation Campaigns usually lead to Political Upheavals and if not contained immediately, can even lead to the ouster of a democratic Government, often times, foreign influence and players using digital and traditional media tools are the means via which a disinformation campaign can occur.

On the other hand, Misinformation campaigns are limited to social media and often times, so disorganized because they are flippantly shared by those who don't process information, it is more difficult to tackle because it doesn't have an end-game, it is just a long-term condition that keeps people uninformed about the true state of affairs or happenings but this can be corrected immediately if other valid facts are provided from a trusted source.

I have drawn this analysis to let us understand what Nigeria suffers from is a SITUATION OF MISINFORMATION.

To tackle this issue of MISINFORMATION, Government does not need to enact a NEW SOCIAL MEDIA REGULATION BILL, it only needs to be PROACTIVE through its assigned AGENCIES like the National ORIENTATION AGENCY, National Broadcasting Commission and the Nigerian Communication Commission.

The Federal Government needs to LAUNCH a counter-offensive on MISINFORMATION via MASSIVE CAMPAIGN on FAKE NEWS and MISINFORMATION where it gets to educate the citizens on how to verify fake and real news, the dangers of sharing information that can't be verified or authenticated and most importantly, taking PROACTIVE measures to RECRUIT Social Media Influencers as Brand Ambassadors to COUNTER Fake NEWS and Misinformation. Government should not hound them.

No Law or Regulation can STOP MISINFORMATION as it is mostly targeted at the IGNORANT and those who are MENTALLY LAZY - in such cases, it is more about the mindset and attitude and that can only be changed through PROACTIVE MEASURES - Our Federal Government needs to activate its mechanisms and make this a PRIORITY rather than promoting the need for a NEEDLESS Social Media Regulation Law.

Our Federal Government can also work with LOCAL Media Organizations and Social Media Companies with active followings in Nigeria to ensure it has a coordinated way to stop misinformation campaigns on social media, this is similar to what Facebook and Twitter has done with the CORONAVIRUS and U.S 2020 Elections.

Lastly, yes, we support the fact that disinformation campaigns should be made a TREASONABLE OFFENSE as those who carry out such CAMPAIGNS are AGENTS of INSTABILITY.

We are willing and open to collaborations with the Government, Private Sector and Development Partners in designing a Counter-OFFENSIVE Policy on Fake News and Misinformation which can be targeted at Nigerians starting from our Secondary School Students down to our Adult Population. Send us your thoughts, ideas or you can reach us via email  - elda@nigac.org

This piece is written by EldaDavid Kehinde Samuel, Elda resides in Lagos, Nigeria. Elda is a Resident Policy Fellow at the Nigerian Global Affairs Council (NIGAC) - The Nigerian Global Affairs Council (NIGAC) is a Technology-based and Digital media-driven Public Policy and Evidence-based Research Think-Tank focused on Policy concerns that revolve around Governance and Public Administration within the Nigerian State and how we interact with the larger World.

My SARS experience

Ibrahim Yusuf Wrote

#ReformEntireForce#

My SARS experience:

So long as you live in Nigeria, you sure can relate with the many stories about the excesses of law enforcement officers.

Yours truly have had scuffles with these crazy characters parading themselves as law officers in the past.

My very first was when I was still in high school, somewhere in Ajegunle, an uptown district of Lagos. It was during the Ramadan fast. After the Ashamu prayers around 8pm, mom had asked me to go to Ago-Hausa to get a few condiments for the breakfast at dawn. I went to Ago-Hausa night shift market. I made my purchases alright and was about heading home when I felt a hand held my trousers. I looked back and saw some men bearing pistols. Before I could voice out my protest, the guys shoved me into a waiting van in the midst of other supposed criminals. When we arrived Ajeromi Police station, not far from the market pronto they took our statements. Our offense according to the officers was that we had gone to the neighbourhood to rape some girls who were on evening classes the previous day. 

I told them I wasn't involved. I showed them the stuffs I bought from the market but they threw them at my faces. They asked us all the young men to remove our shirts and lie our backs on the car bonnets with the engine still running. When it got to my turn, an officer asked me to stop. Subsequently, we were all requested to take our bail individually. I didn't have anything on him having used up all the money to buy stuff except one kobo coin, which I lost during the mêlée. A few guys with money bailed themselves. The rest of us, yours sincerely barely 17 years were asked to go behind the counter after taking our statements. Unfortunately, it wasn't the days of GSM. Thankfully, my dad a retired major in the Army came by around past 11pm to lodge a complain of a missing person. As soon as I saw him, I shouted for joy. Some of the officers who know my dad, stood attention while I was asked to leave with all my items returned. I even told dad my change got missing during the scuffle and he asked that it should be returned. In difference to my dad, the DPO I think gave me a 50 kobo note, which I kept in my portmanteau for weeks. Nevertheless I worked out of that station a hero. 

Another incident happened to me at Cele busstop some 12 years ago. I was waiting patiently for the bus to Oshodi when this gangly fellow accosted me one afternoon. He flashed me his ID and asked to see the content of my bag which was a laptop. I opened it up for inspection. He checked the bag with a fine tooth comb. 

By this time I was running out of patience. Seeing my countenance, he told me to provide the receipt for my laptop. 

By this time, I charged at him. "Why on earth do you think I would be going about with my laptop receipt?" 

He said he didn't care. 

So I asked him, "Officer, do you have a phone?" He said yes. The next thing I said was, "Please show me the receipt!"

He was furious. So I said, that's how ridiculous his request for my laptop receipt sounded to me too. We were both on a shouting match. I'm too stubborn to run away from such infradig on my person. As we were arguing, he brought out his handcuffs to arrest a felon. I just laughed my mirthless laughter. I removed my wrist watch and formed arms akimbo. Boy! He was sweating. I dared him to try me. 

Trust Lagos lookers, they passed stoling glances but never came around. 

He said many unprintable things, I gave it to him back in full measures. Come see hailing. 

Not satisfied, he asked for my ID card, which I supplied. He scrutinised it to no end. And wait for this, he asked me the most foolish question I have ever heard: "The Nation, is it your personal company?"

I told him, no. That I worked as a journalist there. He didn't even know what a journalist was. It was there I knew I was in a horns of a dilemma. You can't win arguments with some of these recruits or korofos if you like. 

Thankfully, Cele Police station, where he was attached was a few metres away. He said, I must follow him. 

I followed him in tow. As soon as we arrived the station, he asked me to go sit down somewhere. Walahi I busted as my adrenaline reached its boiling point. I raised all hell. I banged on the table, "Let me see the Officer in charge here." The gentleman officer, in charge heard the ruckus and he came out of the office. I told him my mind. He apologised to me profusely. We exchange contacts and I left the place. 

However, as a rule, I don't argue with law enforcement officers as much as I would love to during the wee hours because these guys are animals if you meet them in ungodly hours, they're in their elements. If you happen to meet them at such opportune time, respect yourself, play along until it's safer to demand your rights. There's no dead hero. It's better to be safe than to be sorry. That's my story!

Ibrahim Yusuf is a journalists currently with the nation, sunday desk

of The Passion of the Christ, Jim Caviezel is 51 today

During the filming of The Passion of the Christ, Jim Caviezel (playing Jesus) lost 45 pounds, was struck by lightning, accidentally scourged with a whip twice, leaving a 14-inch scar, had his shoulder dislocated, and suffered from pneumonia and hypothermia from hanging mostly naked on a cross for several hours outside. His body was so stressed and exhausted from playing the role that he had to have 2 open heart surgeries after the production! The crucifixion scene alone took 5 weeks of the 2-month filming time. 

The Passion of the Christ is the highest-grossing rated-R movie in the US, of all time, at $370.8M! Worldwide it grossed $611M. Most importantly, it reached many souls around the world. Mel Gibson paid $30M out of his own pocket for the production because no studio would take on the project, and Jim Caviezel was warned not to take the role of Jesus because it would ruin his career. 

Today is Jim Caviezel’s birthday, and he’s 51 years old. He proudly proclaims his faith in Christ amidst the godlessness of Hollywood. 

Thank God for people like him who will step out to do what might not sound “fun”, but it gets out the Word of God and the story of His salvation of mankind. Happy birthday, Jim Caviezel!

Lagos ibadan express way on fire again at long bridge

*OGUN STATE, 1051HRS, WED 16 SEPT 2020:*LAGOS/ IBADAN EXPRESSWAY IS ON A STAND STILL COMING TO LAGOS FROM MOWE END, CAUSED BY A BURNING TRUCK ON LONG BRIDGE

Details shortly

Motivational speaker Lisa Nichol got Engaged at 54.

Lisa Nichol wrote

I’m 54 and I’ve never been married. I’ve previously opted out because it didn’t feel right.  I’ve picked wrong and had to mend my heart. I’ve had to release the anger, forgive myself, and learn to trust Lisa’s picker and intuition again.

It’s been a looong journey of knowing that I’m in the right place, focusing on the right things, even when I’m doing it all alone.... year after year.

I’ve had lonely days and lonelier nights but I refused to settle for momentary satisfaction and the management of the optics of my life or the filtered image of what others may want to see.

My journey has not been easy at times but it has been worth it.

I unapologetically own my seasons of parenting, being single, healing, developing, growing, and now love 🤍

After 10 years of Marcellus being my friend, listening to me as I made my way through single parenting (and CEOing), his steady friendship helped me navigate through broken hearts and challenging business moments. He was my cheerleader from the sidelines each time I chose myself when a relationship didn’t feel right or I doubted the next big move in my career. He has always been my good friend with no strings attached and no agenda. Little did I know back then, that I was sharing my heart, my healing and my aspirations, with my soulmate. He was just a sweet “earth angel” that God blessed me with as a friend. Now don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t blind to how FINE he was (I’m jus sayin 🤷🏾‍♀️), but our friendship was paramount.

This week I excitedly stepped into my next season ...... 

I said yes YES!! 💍

President Buhari daugther marriage this week Friday

Hanan Buhari, the daughter of President Buhari is all set to get hitched to her soulmate Turad Sha’aban this week Friday.

Love In The Air, As Buhari’s Daughter Set To Wed Special Adviser To Ex-Governor Of Lagos State

The wedding comes off on September 4 and it is setting the record as the first to ever take place in the Aso rock in the history of Nigeria. Invitation cards have already been given out to friends and family to attend the wedding ceremony.

Non Complaint traveller risk six months ban

 Federal Government has vowed to sanction air passengers who fail to comply with the guidelines put in place to flatten the COVID-19 curve in Nigeria ahead of the international flight Resumption.

Speaking during a briefing in Abuja on Monday, the Coordinator of the Presidential Task Force on COVID-19, Dr Sani Aliyu said the government is committed to the safety and security of Nigerians.

To Aliyu, the PTF is working with relevant stakeholders in the aviation sector to ensure that Nigeria does not witness a fresh spike of infections.

“It is very likely we will put in place measures to enforce this by suspending travel up to six months or deny foreign travels altogether.

“But beyond the sanctions, because as responsible citizens, we all want our country to continue to be COVID-19-free once we get on top of the pandemic, so, we expect the vast number of travellers to continue to comply with these simple, straightforward measures we are putting in place for the benefit of our country and for the health of our citizens,” he said.

He however warned that passengers entering the country must undergo the mandatory test to ascertain their COVID-19 status.

According to him, any passenger who possesses the symptoms of the coronavirus disease will not be granted entry into the aircraft even after getting a medical report that indicates they are free from the virus.

“There will definitely be sanctions if they do not comply. Sanctions to the airlines if they allow passengers without a COVID-19 PCR result to board, they will be sanctioned on arrival in Nigeria, that is the airline.

“For passengers that decline to do the test, at Day 7, we will still allow them after Day 14 to have a test done after which their details will be forwarded to Port Health, Immigration, and part of the security services."

FACT ABOUT MARRIAGE NO TOLD YOU

 FACT FINDERS: 

Divorce is illegal in Philippines,

India has the lowest divorce 

rate in the World despite her 

culture of arranged marriage

HOW TO GET CANVA PREMIUM FOR FREE AS AN UNDERGRADUATE IN NIGERIA:

HOW TO GET CANVA PREMIUM FOR FREE AS AN UNDERGRADUATE IN NIGERIA:

Have a school email address

Create an account with github.com

Sign up using your school's email address(Github has a way of accessing your data to confirm you are a student) "Quoted"

Select "I am a student" option after confirming your email

Search for student pack on Github's platform or use google(I used google for mine becomes is seems easier)

After opening a page which display's Github's student pack, you see a free access to CANVA.

The next thing to do is sign up a Canva account using that email address and there you go, enjoying a premium app!

#smartphonegraphics

VALIDATE YOUR REASONS

Yesterday, while discussing with my mum, she told me of some advice her local pastor had given her just after she returned from the burial of my dad.It was a tumultuous time in her life and she was faced with challenges on all sides, especially emotionally and financially.

He told her that she had to be strong. That she should get up each morning, dress up properly and go to her office where she worked as company secretary at the time. 

He told her that she either could sit indoors and play the pity party while becoming despondent or pick herself up right after his burial and go out there to ensure that the home had a sustainable means of income.

He specifically told her that folks would talk; they would point at her for the first, second and third week and may never stop but what should matter to her is ensuring that her children's well being were met and her mind whole.

She told me that it wasn't easy. Widowhood at the time required sitting in one place, head shaved and generally relocating to the village for a middle-aged Igbo woman with three kids none of which were in university.

But she did it. Folks talked. Her co-workers, landlord etc were shocked at her seeming non-chalance at the death of her husband. What they didn't know was that the woman was living each day as a survival course.

She made it. And went ahead to also get her GCE at one sitting from attending adult education as she needed it for her job security at the time.  We all went to university and graduated. 

It all isn't perfect now but it is a lot better than back then.

Here's a shoutout to all persons out there fighting their way through while society thinks otherwise - YOUR STRUGGLE IS VALID! YOU SHALL LAUGH AT THE END!

Have a great week people.

Written by: Kingsley Nwabugwu

MIRROR:Android users urged to delete 23 dangerous apps

Android users urged to delete 23 dangerous apps that can fleece you out of thousands
Researchers from Sophos have warned about a new batch of apps that contain dangerous ‘fleeceware’, and could scam you out of thousands

When you subscribe we will use the information you provide to send you these newsletters. Sometimes they’ll include recommendations for other related newsletters or services we offer. Our Privacy Notice explains more about how we use your data, and your rights. You can unsubscribe at any time.
From Google to Samsung, Android smartphones are some of the most popular handheld devices around the world.

But if you own an Android smartphone, a new report may convince you to reassess which apps you have installed.

Researchers from Sophos have warned about a new batch of apps that contain dangerous ‘fleeceware’, and could scam you out of thousands.

Sophos uncovered 23 apps that violate the Google Play Store’s new app policies (scroll down for the full list).

In a blog about the findings, researcher Jagadeesh Chandraiah explained: “The new Google-issued rules are designed to address some forms of deceptive marketing display copy, but they also have some loopholes that permit other behaviour some might consider unscrupulous.”

The dangerous apps use a range of tactics to fleece unsuspecting customers out of money.

Android users can tell if their passwords have been hacked with a single tap - here's how

Android users should do four simple things now to protect their smartphone from hackers
Some use a tactic called ‘blind sub’, in which they lure you in with promises of a free trial, but without details of how long the free trial lasts or how much you’ll be charged.

Others use at technique called ‘spam subscriptions’.

Mr Chandraiah said: “You sign up once, and find yourself subscribed to a bunch of different apps as the fleeceware apps advertise one another.

“Users sometimes unknowingly subscribe to hundreds of dollars worth of app subscriptions by clicking buttons like these.”

Meanwhile, another crafty technique sees the app displaying terms and conditions in grey fonts on white backgrounds, making them unreadable

Mr Chandraiah explained: “While not exclusive to fleeceware, some apps that charge a subscription still display the costs or important terms literally in grey fonts on a white background, or using incredibly tiny fonts that virtually blend into the background of the subscription solicitation on a mobile device.

“In so doing, the publishers perform the letter, but not the spirit, of the rules – they display the full subscription details in a way that the eye trying to read it just naturally wants to glaze over.”

Based on the findings, the researchers are urging Android users to be wary about which apps they download.

Mr Chandraiah added: “Be wary of apps that have short trial and high costs. If you want to unsubscribe from an app trial, please follow the instructions provided by Apple for iOS users or by Google for Android users."

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MANAGING "SEX" AS A TRIGGER OF SICKLE CELL CRISES

MANAGING "SEX" AS A TRIGGER OF SICKLE CELL CRISES

Does sex trigger sickle cell crises?

Should sex trigger sickle cell crises?

Why should sex trigger sickle cell crises when it also triggers the release of happy hormones and most especially natural pain killers like endorphins?

Nothing is generalized in sickle cell disease because of the difference in severity which are due to some factors that may not always be controllable.

      Not all sickle cell crises triggers are avoidable, some can only be managed and sex is one of those triggers that fall under this category.

   As much as there are warriors that sex doesn't trigger their crises , sex  triggering sickle cell crises is a relatively common complaint among sickle cell warriors which makes it worthy of discussion.

   From my personal observation, women complain more than men ,not sure if that is as a result of men being shy to discuss their sex life in relation to crises or the fact many men attain orgasm more than women and release more happy hormones which probably plays a role. 

  Sex can be like a double edged sword for some warriors. Some sometimes  express sex helps with their crises and make them feel better while they also express that sex sometimes triggers it. Some have also complained of crises after multiple rounds of sex and sometimes Priapism after sex

  Sex has a combo of triggers jumbled into 1

1. Sexual intercourse is like a physical activity and physical exertion triggers crises

2. You tend to perspire a lot during sex, which leads to dehydration , dehydration is also a trigger of sickle cell crises

The happy hormones released during sex which includes the natural pain killer "endorphins" may not always be able to handle the pain caused by these factors I mentioned hence the crises.

PRECAUTIONS THAT CAN POSSIBLY HELP AVOID SEX TRIGGERING A SICKLE CELL CRISIS

1. Prioritising your health must be your first concern, love yourself that much.

2. Get a partner that loves you beyond words, a partner that will prioritise your health need over his/her own needs if need be.Anything short of this might not be good enough for you 

3. Get to know and understand your body , a sickle  cell warrior that  understands his/her body should know when he/she is stressed and should rest or else he/she risks a serious crisis.

So you need to understand this, any day you are already feeling extremely stressed,it is  a wrong move to choose to have sex that day. If your partner wants it ,let him/her know you are not fit for sex that day. Aggravating an already present trigger can easily initiate a crisis during or after sex.

4. If you are unwell e.g you have an infection  or you are just recovering from a crisis or you just had a surgery those are already triggers, don't add another trigger to it . Wait till you are very fit

5. Learn to hydrate yourself adequately before sex , possibly during and after sex. To manage the dehydration that occurs as a result of sex

6. Stay away from sex styles and positions that are extremely energy sapping ,staying in some sex positions is actually like a rigorous exercise. If you are a sickle cell warrior you  are better lying supine. 

  

7. Know your limitations, going for too many rounds of sex whithin a short period of time may trigger your crises

8. Learn to engage in foreplays when you are not fit enough to go all the way

9. Avoid rough and aggressive sex, it can easily trigger crises for you

10. If you are a warrior that usually experiences crises DURING sex, taking oral analgesics before sex won't be a bad idea, talk to your doctor about it.

                       Dr. Adesoye Oluwatosin 

                                 (Dr. Tee)

Android: Three signs your smartphone has hidden malware you need to delete now

Android: Three signs your smartphone has hidden malware you need to delete now

Android Malware Signs To Check Smartphone Update

Android users who are concerned about malware should check for these three fail-safe signs

ANDROID smartphone owners concerned about malicious apps lurking on their smartphones can look for three simple signs that something might be amiss on their device. Here's what you need to know.  noted By AARON BROWN

One of the worst things that can happen to your Android smartphone is that your device is infected with malware. This can have dire consequences for your smartphone, including handing over personal information to cyber criminals, slowing down your shiny new phone, or filling legitimate apps and web browser windows with resource-intensive adverts to generate revenue for digital crooks.

And as a slew of recent warnings from Google and other researchers have shown, malware even manages to slip into the Google Play Store. If you can't always trust the software found in this curated digital store, how can you spot when you've installed a problematic app on your

there are a few tried-and-trusted signs that can tell you when your smartphone in harbouring malware.

According to the team at security company Malwarebytes, these are some of the most common signs there is a problem with your handset

You're seeing adverts everywhere – regardless of which app you're using

You've installed a new app, but the icon has disappeared and you can't find it anywhere in the App Drawer

Your phone battery is suddenly draining much, much faster than usual

If you're experiencing any of these, it could be a sign that you've got some malware under the bonnet causing disruption. While not every malicious app is looking to siphon off your credit or debit card details, almost all instances are disorienting – and get in the way of how you would usually use your phone.

Android device that perform slower than usual could be infected with malware.

According to Malwarebytes data, it's pretty common too. The online security firm found close to 200,000 instances of malware on its customers' smartphones and tablets in May alone. And then the same amount again in June 2020.

spotted one of these signs what can you do about it?

Well, there a few things you can do to attempt to rid your smartphone of any malicious software.

First – and most importantly, you'll need to ensure that your smartphone operating system is up to date. Security experts consistently rank a recent operating system release as one of the most important measures that you can take to protect your device and online accounts. If you already have malware lurking on your smartphone, updating to the latest software can patch vulnerabilities – cutting off access leveraged by the malicious software already found on your device.

Of course, update can also keep new malware from being able to get its claws into your handset.

Next up, you'll need to review the permissions the apps already installed on your smartphone hold – you'll be looking for something unusual. Does a word game have permissions to send text messages? Seemingly excessive permissions could be a red flag, security experts say.

Millions of Android users warned of new malicious app threat

If you want to remove an app you no longer use – or one that has permissions that concern you – you'll want to remove all of those permissions before deleting the app. Some malicious apps give themselves administrator privileges, so they can't just be deleted without a few extra steps. If you're struggling to remove a specific app, it might be worth researching online to find what has worked for others.

Finally, you might want to use anti-virus software, like Malwarebytes, Norton, McAfee, or Lookout, to scan for anything that looks awry on your smartphone.

The trust clause in enteprenuers journey

My Business Ordeal!

These season has been challenging, so i added a new wing to my ventures, MarketRusNg so we do the purchases of food stuffs . So i did the first one, a.friend and sister gave her kitchen, to leverage and as stepping stone, our first run was.not entirely smooth or without stress,

 but what supprice me is how Nigerians will claim they want to help you get things chesper and you get it more expensive than your no ice self was buying?

This particular lady retails some of the its on my order lost, so she met me and said don't stress your self, ill help you buy and, mile 23 is not good for you and your legs you know...bla bla bla

I can't cheat you... .

Then when I hot to the market, she was the first to tell am too shrewd with money, 'ah alaroro ni.yin amty, . that should have been my wake up call, but i guess i didn't hear the alarm go off in my head.

So she brought me s tomatoes that is not up to a quarter basket as half basket.?

My client is really angry now and i have to keep this client , what do you think i should do?

 I needs your impute. Kindly comment.

#business #businesdordel #mynigeriabusinessstoried #enteprenuer

#alajapa #businesshelp

Beware of data stealing app Eset warned

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Android users urged to delete chat app that can spy on you and steal your data

Researchers from ESET have warned about a malicious app that can spy on you and even steal your personal data

From Google to Samsung, Android smartphones are some of the most popular handheld devices around the world.

But if you use an Android smartphone, a new report may urge you to reassess which apps you have installed on your device.

Researchers from ESET have warned about a malicious app that can spy on you and even steal your personal data.

The app, called Welcome Chat, is a functioning chat app, but also contains dangerous malware named BadPatch.

The app is promoted on a malicious website, which claims it’s a secure chat platform available on the Google Play Store.

Lukas Stefanko, a researcher at ESET, said: “In regard to the ‘secure’ claim, nothing is further from the truth.

“Not only is Welcome Chat an espionage tool; on top of that, its operators left the data harvested from their victims freely available on the internet. And the app was never available on the official Android app store.”

If you download the app, you’ll be prompted to allow permissions such as send and view text messages, access files, record audio and access contacts and device locatiion

explained: “Such an extensive list of intrusive permissions might normally make the victims suspicious – but with a messaging app, it’s natural they are needed for the app to deliver the promised functionality.”

If you grant these permissions, the app is able to perform a number of malicious actions, including reading your private text messages, accessing your contact lists, and viewing your photos.

WHAT ARE YOUR CHANCES OF BEING HACKED THROUGH SECURITY FLAW?

CYBERSECURITY

Based on the findings, the researchers are urging users not to download any apps from outside the Google Play Store.

Mr Stefanko added: “We strongly recommend that users don’t install any apps from outside the official Google Play store – unless it’s a trusted source such as a website of an established security vendor or some reputable financial institution.

“On top of that, users should pay attention to what permissions their apps require and be suspicious of any apps that require permissions beyond their functionality – and, as a very basic security measure, run a reputable security app on their mobile devices.”

Whatapp tips and tricks

WhatsApp shares 10 secret tips and tricks you might not know about the app

EXCLUSIVE: WhatsApp has revealed its 10 tips for living your best life on the app, including bookmarking main messages and reading messages in 'super-stealth mode

 

With over 1.5 billion daily active users, WhatsApp is without a doubt one of the most popular messaging apps around.

If you use WhatsApp, you’ve probably got the basics of the app covered, but there are actually several secret features you may not be making full use of.

Speaking exclusively to Mirror Online, WhatsApp has revealed its 10 tips for living your best life on the messaging app.

From bookmarking main messages to reading messages in ‘super-stealth mode’, here are the top WhatsApp tips and tricks you might not know about the app.

1. Record hands-free voice notes

While voice notes are one of the most popular features on WhatsApp, many users are unaware that you can record voice notes hands-free.

 

WhatsApp said: “Did you know that if you hold down the microphone icon and swipe up, it locks the voice note function to ‘record’, leaving you able to record your message hands-free?

“Once you have finished recording your message, just press send!”

2. Bookmark your main messages

While WhatsApp does have a search function, trying to find messages from a while ago can be tricky.

Thankfully, there’s a sneaky way to bookmark key messages to make sure you can find them easily and quickly in the future.

WhatsApp said: “Make use of the ‘star’ message function where you can bookmark key messages that you can easily view again in one central location.Just press down on the message that you want to bookmark and then tap the ‘star’ icon.

“For iPhone users, you can find all your starred messages by going to Settings & Starred Messages or click the name of your chat and tap ‘Starred messages’. For Android users, tap ‘More options’, and tap ‘Starred messages’.”

3. Tailor your status to every occasion

Statuses are an easy way to tell all your contacts something at once.

WhatsApp explained: “You can set your ‘About’ status to a pre-existing option, or you can create your own for whatever activity you may be up to!

“To do so, go to Settings; [Tap your name]; About; Status, and select a pre-existing option, or, to personalise it, click Edit, select any of the pre-existing options, and share with the world what you’re currently up to.”

4. Set your phone aside but still be online

Sneaking your smartphone out to check your WhatsApp messages at work can be tricky, but thankfully there’s a way to check your messages without even touching your phone.

WhatsApp said: “Download the WhatsApp Web desktop app, which mirrors your phone’s conversations on your computer. This means you can send the normal WhatsApp messages, photos and GIFs from your computer, but now in double quick time.

5. Elevate your conversations with Stickers

While many people use emoji in their messages, Stickers can offer a fun alternative to jazz up your conversations.

WhatsApp said: “When you open a conversation, next to the field you input text into, there is a little

square icon with a folded side page. When you click that, it comes up with your stickers – but you can add more! Find out how to download more stickers in WhatsApp’s FAQs.”

 

READ MOREWhatsApp Sticker update will make your chats MUCH more dynamiThere are often times when you want to read a WhatsApp message without your friend knowing.

While there’s always the option to hide ‘Read Receipts’, this approach isn’t for everyone. Thankfully, there’s a sneaky alternative, that lets you read a full message and avoid blue ticks.

WhatsApp explained: “If you see a message come in on your iPhone’s lock screen, press down slightly on the message on the screen and it pulls up the full text, but you won’t appear to the other person that you’ve read the message. Stealthy!”

7. Pin your most important friends or groups

Scrolling through your message to find your favourite person’s chats can be annoying, but there’s actually a way to pin their conversation to the top of your inbox.

WhatsApp said: “On the iPhone, swipe to the right on the chat you want to pin to the top and then tap ‘Pin’. On Android, tap and hold on the chat and then tap the pin icon.”

 

 

8. Regain control of your groups

Have you been annoyed by a friend changing the name of a group, or switching the group photo?

Well, there’s a way to change the group settings so only you can allow these changes.

WhatsApp said: “You can change the group settings so that only admins are allowed to change group info. To do so, click on your group name and go to Group Settings; Edit group info.”

9. Find out who you talk to the most

If you’ve ever wondered who your favourite person on WhatsApp is, you’ll be happy to hear that it’s fairly straightforward to find out.

WhatsApp said: “You can find out who you send the most messages to and how much storage each person you speak to takes up by going to: Settings; Data and Storage Usage; Storage Usage; Select Contact.”

10. Manage who adds you to groups

While group chats are a useful way to communicate with your friends and family, there’s nothing annoying than being added to a chatty group with no relevance to you.

WhatsApp recently rolled out the ability to manage who adds you to groups.

WhatsApp recently rolled out the ability to manage who adds you to groups (Image: WhatsApp)

• 

• WhatsApp: the ultimate guide

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• Deleting messages

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• In-app payments

It added: “To ensure that you only join groups that you

 want to be in, you can manage your group permission settings.

1“Once enabled, the friend who wants to add you to a group will be required to first send you an invitation link in the app. If you accept it, you will then be added to the group. If not, the link will expire in three days.”

To enable it, go to Settings; Account; Privacy; Groups and select one of three options: “Everyone,” “My Contacts,” or “My Contacts Except.”

“My Contacts” means only users you have in your address book can add you to groups and “My Contacts Except” provides additional control for who among your contacts can add you to a group.