Yesterday, while discussing with my mum, she told me of some advice her local pastor had given her just after she returned from the burial of my dad.It was a tumultuous time in her life and she was faced with challenges on all sides, especially emotionally and financially.
He told her that she had to be strong. That she should get up each morning, dress up properly and go to her office where she worked as company secretary at the time.
He told her that she either could sit indoors and play the pity party while becoming despondent or pick herself up right after his burial and go out there to ensure that the home had a sustainable means of income.
He specifically told her that folks would talk; they would point at her for the first, second and third week and may never stop but what should matter to her is ensuring that her children's well being were met and her mind whole.
She told me that it wasn't easy. Widowhood at the time required sitting in one place, head shaved and generally relocating to the village for a middle-aged Igbo woman with three kids none of which were in university.
But she did it. Folks talked. Her co-workers, landlord etc were shocked at her seeming non-chalance at the death of her husband. What they didn't know was that the woman was living each day as a survival course.
She made it. And went ahead to also get her GCE at one sitting from attending adult education as she needed it for her job security at the time. We all went to university and graduated.
It all isn't perfect now but it is a lot better than back then.
Here's a shoutout to all persons out there fighting their way through while society thinks otherwise - YOUR STRUGGLE IS VALID! YOU SHALL LAUGH AT THE END!
Have a great week people.
Written by: Kingsley Nwabugwu
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